


Tried To Be A Son And Daughter Rolled Into One

by Honey_Rae_Pluto



Series: Short stories [4]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: F/M, Female Brian May, Mpreg, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:27:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28514193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Honey_Rae_Pluto/pseuds/Honey_Rae_Pluto
Summary: A Brianna/ Roger take on the childhood Friends au
Relationships: Brian May/Roger Taylor, John Deacon/Freddie Mercury
Series: Short stories [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979560
Comments: 15
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

She knows she’s putting it off for weeks and weeks, throwing up at school, having to run out during her exams, nearly falling asleep in class from random bouts of exhaustion, she knows something is wrong, and she can only think of one thing.

She knows Roger would be mad, he'd get angry and snap or yell or something - a one night stand that wasn’t meant to mean anything was certainly not meant to end like this, so she goes into town on foot, going into the far away chemist to avoid being seen, using the self service checkout and shoving the test into her school bag, running back into the school just before the bell rings for the next class.

The whole way through the next few hours she can’t think straight, the weight of the tiny plastic stick in her bag pulling her down. She can see the teacher explaining something, the strong smell of coffee in the room making her stomach churn, she has to loosen her tie to breath.

She knows Freddie’s been chattering away too, it's a good job he can talk to himself because she’s not been replying in the slightest, John probably would’ve said something if he was there, Roger too. But she was lucky, January meant study leave so they weren’t there, and Freddie was a bit too hungover to really focus on any of the details, so she slipped away from him at lunch.

Brianna knew she'd judged teenage mum's her whole life, how could someone be so stupid? It seemed so obvious to her to just not get pregnant. But there she was, watching the second line slowly appear, crying in a school bathroom while whoever was by the sinks were bitching about something menial.

She uses her phone calendar to work it out, ten weeks already. Ten weeks since her and Roger had been together. She could hide it, she decided, her parents didn't need to know.

But that idea failed immediately.

Brianna still had horrible morning sickness well into the second trimester, and there was only so many times she could lie to her mum about it, at least she’d stopped losing weight, but now something else was causing the extra pounds. Something she wouldn’t be able to hide forever.

"If you can't go to the hospital, what's wrong?" Ruth gave her a tired look, "You barely keep food down, Bri. That's not normal."

"Mum, please, it's nothing."

"No, really, if it's something silly like stomach ulcers that's easy to fix, it runs in your family. You probably wouldn't miss much school either."

"No, it's not, I know it isn't."

"Then what? You know what it is?" Ruth watched her shake her head, "Bri come on, no one is sick this much, I wasn't even this bad when I was pregnan-"

Ruth watches her flinch, suddenly realising it for herself, "Brianna..."

"Mum I'm sorry... Where are you going?" She scrambled after her, not getting close enough before the door was shut, "Please don't tell dad, mum please!"

But it was too late.

Her dad must’ve gotten home just as Ruth got downstairs, the news quickly spreading. Brianna could hear them arguing downstairs, but she didn't dare go down to see what the problem was. Well no, she knew what the problem was, that was obvious.

Her stomach flipped when the footsteps started approaching, not from morning sickness either, fully thinking she was going to throw up when the door slowly started to open.

"You can get rid of it," Her dad stood in the doorway, looking down at her, a look in his eyes she had never seen before, purest disappointment. "We can get you an appointment as soon as possible."

"I don't want to kill it." She admitted quietly, "I don't think I could anyway."

"You don't do anything, they'd just give you some pills to take."

"No, I'm past the three month mark," Brianna inadvertently pressed her hand to the small swelling where Roger's child was, "I'll just give them away."

"Fine," he relented, knowing she'd probably already ran through it in her head, "Just don't let anyone know, okay? We don't need this ruining your career."

Brianna nodded, not looking up.

"And don't think your friends are allowed to come in or talk to you, especially not the blond one, scruffy thing, you can tell he's from a broken family."

The father of her child. She should tell Roger, he’d want to know, right? Then again, he barely had a father figure himself, no way he’d want to be one in his own right. And it was him who’d left in the morning, him who’d moved on without talking about it. She wasn’t keeping it anyway, why would it matter?

No, no she’d keep him out of it all, it would be for the best, save him the heart ache or fury.

***

"Bri?'

She ducked as best she could behind the fruit display as soon as she heard her name. She'd only gone shopping a few times, and only when the others were at school so she wouldn't be seen, but apparently someone was bunking off - or maybe they hadn’t started yet; it’s not like she went anymore.

"Bri, that's you, right?" Freddie approached, more confidently now he'd seen her face, a six pack of red bull under his arm, "Oh shit..."

Brianna sighed, eight months pregnant (feeling even bigger if anything) she couldn't really pretend it was just bad lighting or casual weight gain, and she could tell from his stare he’d spotted it right away. "Yeah, yes I am."

"You've been gone forever, Roger's been moping around, John's just been snapping all the bloody time, and you've been hiding? Fucking pregnant?"

"Fred it's complicated," She shook her head, "I fucked up at the party in November, I couldn't be back at school after the exams."

"The party? The party you and Rog… Oh… Oh!" A thought seemed to go through him, making him put the shopping down and head out, forcing her to follow.

"You can't tell anyone, Freddie I mean it," too late, of course John was waiting with his ford focus in the car park, looking just as shocked as Freddie had been to see her.

"Deaks," Freddie smacked at his arm quickly, "John she's pregnant, from Roger probably."

"I didn't say tha-"

"You didn't say anything for months, Bri," Freddie snapped, "You have to tell Roger."

“No.”

“Is it his baby?”

“... yes.”

“Then tell him,” Freddie gave her a hard look, not angry, but as if there was no other way than him being right, “He’s really not taken it well that you haven’t spoken to him, so tell him or I will.”

***

As soon as the knocking came crashing into her window, she knew Freddie hadn't kept his mouth shut, well she had promised to tell, she just hadn’t said when.  
Roger was standing outside, angry as anything when she opened the window, ignoring the shushing as he got inside, glaring at her.

"You're pregnant. You're pregnant and you didn't fucking tell me?" He whisper-yelled.

"Roger it's complicated," the baby was more restless than ever, Braxton Hicks crippling her invariably too, "I'm not keeping them."

"Let me guess, your parents told you not to?" Roger's eyes flicked down at the massive bump, almost foreign on his friend. She hadn't filled out well around it, so her usual lanky limbs made it very strange to look at. "...is it mine?"

"I can't tell you that," She wanted to nod, they both knew it, too in tune with each other, "You can be as angry as you like, I deserve it."

"You can't just do what they tell you all the damn time," Roger shook his head, sighing, "Do they know where they came from? Have you told them?"

"No, no it'd be a shitsho- ow," she reached out to hold onto the wall, taking some breaths and trying not to groan too loud (not to wake anyone up, or scare Roger for that matter), "Fuck..."

"Is it coming now?" Too late, Roger had gone white as a sheet, she could've almost laughed.

"Just practice ones, not for two weeks," She told him, watching as he ran his hands through his blond hair, would the baby have that? No, she couldn't think about that. "Baby's just flipped to point the right way."

"God... So it's really happening," Roger realised, "I want a DNA test done after they're here."

"Rog, I've done this to protect you, so you don't get dragged in," Bro glared, "Why would you risk that?"

"Because what if I want to know about them? Hmm? What if I want the adoption people to send updates or whatever?"

"I could forward them to you if you want then so fucking badly."

"What? Like how you forwarded this news?"

“To protect you.” She snapped.

“I didn’t need protecting!” Roger yelled back, regretting it as soon as he heard her parents next door.

Busted.

“What the hell is going o- you?” Her dad stopped short, glaring at him once he realised there was an intruder, “I assume he’s the father of it.”

“Yes.” Brianna admitted, bracing herself for the worst.

And it happened, there was yelling and shouting between the two of them, her mum coming in too, trying to get the men to both calm down but only adding to the noise. Noise she suddenly couldn’t concentrate on.

Not now that her waters broke.

***

Roger knew he probably should've asked John to drive him instead of doing it himself, he was far far too shaky and couldn't keep his mind on the traffic as he made his way to the hospital.

He knew there wasn't exactly a rush, it would be hours yet before anything happened, and that would still be a fairly quick delivery, but the thought of leaving her there didn't sit well with him.

Roger vividly remembered the previous night, clambering up through the window, he'd only known she was pregnant a week earlier, he hadn't seen it for himself til then, the early morning fight, the fact she’d gone into labour in the midst of it. It was all a mess. She was so so set against keeping it too, said she couldn't look after it, that it'd have a better life away from her.

The blond took a breath as he parked up, she had no intention of being a mum, which sort of meant he couldn't be a dad... Did he want to?  
By the time he found her room (carefully avoiding her father at the cafeteria) she was already hooked up to an IV line, hospital gown on and hugging herself quietly.

Brianna looked up once he entered, reaching out immediately, any sort of comfort felt good.

"Does it hurt?" Roger asked, having expected what he'd seen on films, the screaming and swearing, but she was just sitting up in bed looking tired.

"Yeah," she said quietly, glancing to where her mum was reading a book in the corner, clearly not wanting her to hear, "They've given me pitocin, try speed it up."

"So baby is definitely coming," Roger nodded, "Do we... Do we get any time with them? After they're here I mean."

"We get up to five hours, then there's a trial of ten days or something if you change your mind about giving them up." Brianna pulled his hand to a spot that was getting kicked at, "The decision can be separate."

"Meaning?"

"We don't both have to agree to give them away." Brianna gritted her teeth, not continuing for a long minute, "...I'm not sure I want to lose them now."  
"Right... We'll cross that bridge when we get to it." Roger decided, not wanting to stress her too much.

Brianna gritted her teeth as another wave of pain came over her, trying not to show it too much, “... Any names?”

“Eh… Evander, maybe? If it’s a boy,” He’d sort of known for years he liked that name, he just never thought he’d have to use it so early, “ If it’s a girl maybe Meadow something, or something Meadow? Keep that bit of heritage in with a twist.”

“Luna… If it’s a girl then, Luna Meadow” Bri nodded, still groaning. “Or Evander Harry if it’s a boy… Harry like dad.”

That got Ruth’s attention, “Bri, you don’t have to, you know that. Even if you keep them you don’t have to name them after anyone.”

“I want to.” Roger watched her relax a bit, contraction must have ended, “Might be a girl anyway.”

“We’ll see, soon I assume,” Roger tried to count it out, her water broke five hours ago? So she must’ve been in labour before that.

“I’m at seven,” Brianna clarified, “Shouldn’t be more than a couple more hours.”

And it wasn’t.

It wasn’t the easiest few hours of either of their lives, pacing around the room slowly, midwives coming in to check the dilation, the fact she still wasn’t taking pain relief, still biting her lip rather than cause too much of a fuss, it all seemed to come to an end when they said she was ready.

Brianna was helped back onto the bed by several hands, pushing into the pressure and pain, clutching onto Roger’s hand for dear life… she wanted this baby, right? As the pain got worse and worse she was half sobbing, feeling like she was being torn in half all for something she hadn’t wanted until today...

"There you go, all done," Roger watched as the screaming bloody thing was put on top of Bri, her whole body sagging with exhaustion beneath it, "Little girl."

"A girl?" He asked numbly, trying to get a glimpse of the newborn between the hands trying to clean her up, his own hand still holding Brianna's, "A daughter?"

“Luna…” Brianna mumbled, eyes already shut.

"Come with me," One of the nurses had Luna wrapped up in a towel, nodding at Roger to follow, "We'll get this little one all cleaned up."

Roger glanced at Brianna, "You okay? I can stay with you if you want-"

"No... Go with her... Ah..." She groaned, letting go of his hand, "Go with our baby."

"I've got her," Ruth promised him, taking her daughter's hand, "It's okay, just the afterbirth now, don't worry."

Roger nodded, kissing her cheek, "I'll be right back."

The nurse led him to a connected room with a weird looking sink, showing him how to hold Luna and wash her, letting him try it too. Roger was amazed, such a tiny thing, but he could already see his own features there.

"Make sure you support her head, we'll get her weighed up," the nurse helped him lower the baby into a scale, "She's very little for a singleton, five pounds and a half."

"That's okay, isn't it?" Roger looked up, "She'll get bigger and healthy, right?"

"Of course, don't worry, we just thought she'd be bigger based on bump size, nothing to worry about-"

They were cut off by a scream from next door, a second scream made Roger flinch back into the room.

"Bri?"

"It'll just be the plac-" the nurse was cut off by the sound of a baby crying, Roger turned to see Luna happily asleep... What the hell was going on?

He picked his daughter up again, trying not to panic as he went back through the doors to Brianna's room, heart missing a beat at what he saw.

Bri was half sobbing, a bloodied creature wailing on her chest getting wiped up by the remaining nurse.

"What's happened?" He asked numbly, not even noticing he was walking over, "That's a baby..."

No one seemed to answer him, doctors came in and out talking in medical jargon and Brianna didn't seem to be listening to anything, and for what felt like an eternity he couldn't comprehend it...

"Must've been hiding in the scans," the nurse said, "Twins, looks like you've got a little boy too."

"Evander... Luna and Evander..."

***

Roger was almost glad when Ruth offered to take the babies to get measured and tested this time.

They'd helped Brianna finish up, getting her set for the recovery room and making sure she had the right shots and IVs running in. Roger hadn't let he of her hand yet, she seemed far too shell shocked.

"Love,” Roger stroked her hair back, still plastered to her forehead with sweat, "It's okay."

"It's not... Roger it's not.." she shook her head. Everything hurt, mentally, physically, emotionally... She couldn't even begin to cope with it, not when there were two little creatures that now depended on her.

"It will be."

"I don't know what to do... I don't want to let them go... But I can't deal with it..."

"Babe, it'll be fine, I'll stay at yours, I'll help as much as I can," Roger promised, "You'll be in here a while after all that, I'll have my things moved before you go home, okay?"

Brianna nodded. She didn't believe him, but she trusted him. “Let’s just do the five hours, then decide.”

Roger let her, she'd probably take a long time to get over it enough to handle what had happened, hopefully he could help her steer clear of any bad depressive episodes after this too, and god knows she probably didn't trust doctors anymore.

But right now she was safe, and they had two tiny babies being wheeled back through to them.

***

"They're mine, aren't they?" Roger perched on her hospital bed, looking at the sleeping bundles between them. The twins were born a few hours ago, still pink and squidgy, the lightest blonde curls peeking through under their beanies.

"Yeah..." Brianna nodded slowly, her mum had left soon after they were born, letting her and Roger have a moment, "They're saying that the social workers will be here for them soon."

"They'll go to a new family if they go, right?" Roger looked up, "they'll be well looked after?"

"This isn’t the movies, Rog, they'll go into social care, indefinitely. Might get adopted, might end up fostered, probably separated, might stay in the care home forever." Bri shook her head, this clearly wasn't a recent discovery, "I wish I could keep them, I just don’t know."

"Maybe," Roger let his hand rest on the nearest baby's chest (little Evander) as he started whimpering, "I'd look after you both, you know, and your mum too. I'd help if I could."

"Roger don't, you can't give me that dream, not when it's impossible." Brianna looked down, "I didn't think I'd want to keep them so much."

"Neither did I, Brimi," Roger nodded, "neither did I."

“So we do it.” Brianna had a look on her face now, she’d already pretty much refused to let anyone other than Roger near the babies, and even then he's only allowed to hold the little ones with intense supervision, no stranger’s were allowed near her children now.“We keep them.”

When her mum came in to take Eden away, she broke down. She’d been asleep, the babies in a big cot by the side of the bed, Roger hadn’t even immediately questioned it when Ruth came in to get them, he thought she was just looking. But then she was moving them, and suddenly Brianna was awake and sitting up in bed, trying to get out of it to follow.

It was then that her mum stopped, letting her take the babies before the guitarist hurt herself.

Roger had no idea what to even do, silently watching her have a panic attack, holding Luna to her chest and holding onto his hand harder than ever. "Babe..."

"No, no, no," she shook her head, "I can't do it. I won't."

"Bri," her mum tried, "You've got a future."

"No, don't want it." the babies started crying too, sensing their mum's sorrow, "Please."

"Eh, Mrs may," Roger looked over, "Can she? I'd help out, pay for what I can too."

"You're both children yourselves," Ruth shook her head, but she didn't look like she had the conviction to carry through with giving the baby away, "Just think about it, okay? I'll ask them for a week's trial."

Brianna couldn't remember what day it was, never mind the last time she'd had a shower, or eaten something that wasn't toast. Maybe her parents were right?

Maybe she should just give up...?


	2. Chapter 2

"Brimi, look," Roger was smiling, both babies in his arms, "They're holding hands."

"Hmm," that helped, like a plaster on a cut, it all still hurt, but she could see it was healing, watching her three blonds bonding. "Lemme get a photo."

He got her phone out, already jam packed with pictures of her little cherubs, two tiny beans that were her children, small wispy blond locks of hair starting to come through. Evander was more like her in a way, still baby blue eyed but her nose and mouth were definitely there. Roger had Luna as his double, the more rounded features (even on a baby they were different) and the same frown, same pouty frown that Brianna couldn’t help but laugh at.

"Send it to the lads, they were asking about you." Roger told her, "I think they want to meet the kids soon."

"Really?" She raised an eyebrow from behind the phone, "I don't know how long the babies can be away from me, I can make up some bottles or stay close by-"

"They want to see you too," Roger cut her off, "Babe, they're our best friends, of course they do."

"I..." She would have argued with him, but what was the point? Was that just something else that was out of her control now? "Okay."

"Yeah?" Roger smiled, "Here, why don't you wait until they're both fed, go take a nice hot shower, I'll make some pasta, we can watch lord of the rings and cuddle up to them, how about that?"

"Sounds lovely." And it did, except she knew that the babies probably wouldn't be hungry at the same time, and that they'd need changed a few times too, and if they got fussy-

"Stop thinking so hard," Roger took her hand, balancing the twins against him, "I'll make sure everything is just fine."

Brianna nodded, he was probably right, even if she couldn’t fathom how.

***

"They'll be here on Saturday to inspect the house, background checks are already happening, extra parenting courses, it's endless." Roger scrolled through his phone later on that night, the film credits were rolling and the babies had been sleeping for a while now, hopefully they’d just need their eight o’clock feed to last them to midnight. Roger had gotten the email from the social services help team, a bunch of attachments that they had to read, the list of things they had to go through now that they'd decided to be parents, which - it was heavily implied - was the wrong choice, "How the fuck are we a risk, but actual murders can just pop them out and keep them?"

"Because society is fucked," Bri didn't turn to him, picking up Luna as she started to cry, checking her nappy quickly before trying to feed her.

She was always worried that if she didn’t get the babies sorted out and quiet fast enough they’d think she was a bad mother, that if one set the other off and they both started crying, someone would say she couldn’t handle it, try to take them away. Bri tried to put those thoughts aside as she looked down, concentrating on trying to feed the little one under the scarf, "That and we aren't old enough to get drunk or work full time, legally we're hardly better than her."

"Fuck sake," He put his phone down before he could get angry about it, "You know you don't need to cover up, I've seen it before, I was literally there when they were born."

"I know, but that's different. That's a one off," Bri shook her head, "I don't know what we even are right now, we've not spoken in months."

"For now we're just mum and dad," Roger told her simply, "We'll work through the rest."

"...I'm sorry for not telling you," she admitted, "I was so stupid, if I hadn't bumped into Fred and John you'd probably still not know "

"Bri leave it, it's happened." Roger shook his head, "Let's just ignore it for now."

And they did, they ignored the gaping hole in their relationship as the days passed, the nosey inspectors came and went and slowly the babies’ hit their six week mark, getting bigger and healthy as they aged, Roger was still going between the two houses a lot, and his own mum had offered to help out too and it was starting to look okay.

But Brianna couldn’t have felt less in charge of anything.

The kids were slowly getting used to the outside world, and it seemed like they were starting to fall into a routine, working out their days with two little increasingly blond children. Brianna could hear them all breathing quietly in their slumber, the babies were in a cot in front of them and Roger was sleeping on the bed behind her. In theory it was a fairytale scene, something people wanted.

But Brianna was almost in tears.

"Babe," Roger curled around her, "You're as stiff as a board, relax. Get some sleep while Pinky and Perky are quiet."

"I'll try." Her usual reply now. What she'd said to the social workers that wanted to take her babies away, the doctors that questioned her mental state, her parents who judged her... No one thought she could do it, maybe she couldn't?

"I believe you," Roger gave her arm a squeeze. He'd never really doubted anything, it all seemed too simple for him to work out, "do you want to talk about it?"

"I..." Did she? Yeah, yeah she did. Not to anyone other than Roger, no one else would understand. "I have no control over any of what happens anymore, even when they were born, I didn't know they were going to take Luna away so quickly, and they pulled Evander out of me as if I wasn't even there... Like I was useless."

"You're not, what happened was a horrible shock," Roger held her hand, "But you're in control now. Only you can feed them, only you can have that bond with them, and love them like you do. That's all your control."

"You think so?"

"I know so, you're a good mum."

***

"She looks just like you did, bit blonder maybe," Ruth was only meant to hold Luna for a moment while Brianna got the pram set up in the living room, Roger was doing an exam that day so he couldn't sort it himself, but he’d be taking their daughter to her check up later. "Her eyes have started changing colour, going hazel now."

"Uhuh," Brianna was sitting on the floor with the thing built now (they’d not really attempted to take the kids out before this point, and the pram was only build for one tiny human), waiting to get her daughter back, far from expecting this reaction. “I reckon Evan’s are staying blue.”

"Hard to believe she's gotten so big too," Ruth bounced the baby a little, no signs of handing her over, "How heavy is she now?"

"Eleven lbs," Bri told her, "She was never a tiny baby, mum, you know that."

"I know, I just... I feel like I missed a lot. If you'd been ten years older I wouldn't have just ignored her like that."

"Mum..."

"No, seriously, everytime you need help you don't ask for it, or you keep it between you and Roger," Ruth shook her head, "Grandmas are meant to be there too."

"Do you want to take her?" Brianna offered, "Her first walk in the buggy, yours if you want it."

"Really?"

"Mhm," she nodded, "I'll make sure she's fed and get you the bag, and you’ll need to be back here by the hour so Rog can drive her to the doctor’s appointment."  
“I could go with him,” Ruth suggested quickly, still rocking Luna to her chest, “So he isn’t so stressed driving with her alone in the back.”

“...Yeah,” Brianna nodded, it meant she could stay with Evander, and since there was only one baby seat - they had ordered another one that seemed to never arrive - it solved a few issues. “That would be really helpful actually mum.”

***

"I saw the certificate... You didn't need to do that." Harold looked at his only child.

It's the first time they've been in the same room alone for months, certainly since the babies were born. Brianna hadn't expected him to come in, she'd been sanding down some wood for the guitar, Evander strapped to her front (Roger had taken Luna to her jabs a while earlier, leaving the pair alone), sleeping happily to the sound of wood being worn away.

"I wanted to," Brianna told him, "Roger got Meadows added to Luna's, that was his dad's middle name, and his granddad's, and his. Harry is your name, and your dad's, and Harriet is part of me too. It made sense."

"Is tradition worth it?" Harold grabbed one of the tins of wood wax from the top shelf, opening it for her, "I've not been the best, not as a dad, definitely not as a grandad."

"So? You're still here, you've allowed me to stay and keep them, you let Roger in when he needs to. I couldn't ask for more."

"Brimi... Allowing you to have a family and be able to stay with them was the bare minimum... Let me take Evan, just for a bit. You can drill in the finger board slot in peace."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah I am." Her dad came over, helping her get out of the sling, just carrying Evander in it for now, “He can come and watch the news with me. You sort your guitar out, I don’t want to hear anyone in your band complain that it’s not good enough, do a good job on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey
> 
> thank you so much for all the kind comments and kudos, I hope you enjoy this. As always head over to my tumblr for asks or extra content or whatever on this story!


	3. Chapter 3

"They're very small." John was keeping a distance from them, not daring to touch either of the little squirming things.

This was the first time the twins had met Freddie and John, first time they’d really met anyone outside of their immediate family. Well, met was one way of putting it, the four month olds were fast asleep. Evander had been more awake when the other half of the band had come in, but he’d been too milk drunk to really interact or keep his eyes open.

"Well, yeah, there was less space to grow with two of them," Roger nodded, Evander awake in his arms for now, "They don't bite, Deaks. For now anyway."

"What DO they do?" Freddie was over by Bri and Luna, poking at the baby's little hand to try to wake her up.

"Stop it you," she elbowed him, "At the moment they just eat and sleep, give it a few more months and they'll be a little more alert - but they can hold their own heads up a lot better now."

“Could they not?” John looked at Evander curiously, “Can I pick him up?”

“Sure,” Roger held his son out, “Just mind to support his neck-”

“What happens if we don’t?” Freddie asked.

“You’ll get a slap.” Bri told him, “Don’t even try it.”

“I wouldn’t.” Freddie watched John carefully take the baby close, almost as if he'd break the poor thing. He committed that image to memory, something changing very slightly in his mind, or beginning to change. "Four months doesn’t seem too bad, is it? So by the end of the summer they'll be fun."

"I guess," Roger looked at him, no point explaining that fun wasn't really the purpose of it all, "We were going to take them to Blackpool in the caravan at the end of summer, might be fun."

"They'll be ten months then so it should be okay," Brianna added, "Just a weekend away but it'll be one for the scrapbook."

"Oh, I'll lend you the Polaroid," Freddie told her, "And I wanna see the pics after, they better be cute."

"I just can't believe you kept them," John mumbled, "I mean they're nice and everything, but Jesus, I wouldn't know what I'm doing."

"We don't, not really," Roger admitted, looking at his son, "But they mean the world, so it doesn't matter."

***

“Is it just the four of you? Or are your parents here too?” 

Roger had just come back from parking the car, the caravan now fully propped up and ready. Brianna had the picnic blanket out, just somewhere to let the babies lie down after a long drive (much to John’s amusement on the phone) in a slow car made slower by the rented out ‘heap of shit’ (once again Deaky’s word choice) chained onto the back of it.

Roger didn’t exactly disagree with that comment, he hated caravans, hated being stuck behind them on the motorway, hated how crap of a holiday they were. But Brianna had been right about one thing: it was an experience.

He could remember his own family holidays, they always seemed nicer now. Or maybe he was remembering them through photographed smiles and filmed running and laughing, through silly anecdotes about crying over balloons his mum would tease him for, or when he lost his two front baby teeth on a stick of rock.

It was just warmth.

He doubted it had been like that in real life, his dad had been there - likely swearing and fuming on the road and drinking in the evenings. And his mum would’ve been stressed out, probably too tense to enjoy them much herself. But it was an experience.

It was a family holiday. Even if it was cheap and cold a lot of the time, or if there wasn’t much to do except walk around the sands and get fish and chips, he was there with his girlfriend, the love of his life if he was honest. And their babies, two little beasties in dungarees and jumpers who wouldn’t remember this, but they were important to it all.

Unlike the sneering fat old woman who’d come back from emptying the lavy of her own caravan who was currently staring at them.

“What?” Brianna looked up, not quite understanding her.

“Are you children here alone?”

“Yes..?” Roger blinked, “We’re here with our children.”

“So you’re unsupervised, I can and will call the police about the neglect that’s going on here.”

Roger could feel his blood start to boil. This happened a lot, people just assuming that they were starving or hurting their twins because they couldn’t possibly be half decent parents and still in highschool.

He was about to be the one to yell, the one that put his foot down so his missus and children could carry on in peace. He’d already opened his mouth to start talking the telling off-

“You what? We’re both legally allowed to be here, we have booking documents, we have drivers liscenses.” Brianna snapped, pulling the babies to her chest, “How dare you assume the upper hand?”

“You heard her,” Roger added. He’d get the car and move them to the other side of the field later on, or phone the site manager.

He crouched by Bri, taking Luna into his arms, “Why don’t we head to the beach? Relax while the sun is still warm.”

“Yeah,” She nodded, suddenly shy from it all, “I’ll get a bag set up for them.”

“Let me help you,” Roger glanced behind him, the woman still watching them from the doorway of her caravan, turning her head when he looked to pretend she hadn’t been spying. “I think you shut her up.”

“I guess,” She was already inside, getting the baby bag open, “God I felt like such a moron.”

“Why?”

“I just yelled at an old woman, I didn’t even have a proper argument. Must’ve looked like such an imbicile-”

“I think you looked hot, actually,” Roger grinned, kissing her cheek, “Wouldn’t mind hearing that tone of voice again.”

“Shush.” She shook him off, trying not to smile to herself.

“You can certainly put me in my place, Brimi,” Roger hugged her from behind. They’d not really been so flirty in months, more than months really - probably since the babies were conceived. But it felt right.

“Broad daylight, and the kids are here, fuck off,” She giggled, elbowing him just hard enough to get the bag shut and onto her shoulder. “Plus if it’s a vehicle it's dogging and I’m not lowering myself to that.”

“It’s only dogging if someone’s watching.” Roger pointed out.

“I wouldn’t put it past that old lady.” 

***

“We’ve got one year left of school, can you believe?” Brianna looked up as Luna dug into the sand with the tiny spade, spraying the stuff around her more than achieving anything, “Feels like it’s not been long since we were in first year.”

“We’ll have to get the scrapbook done, something nice for the four of us,” Roger nodded, Evander sleeping in the buggy next to him, “The Smile family album.”

“Queen now apparently, well that’s what Freddie decided after three tins of wicked and a series of Rupauls,” Bri told him, “Keeps him happy.”

“You think it’ll work?”

“The band?” He nodded at her, “I don’t know, maybe? We’re lucky if we get nearby universities, I might still have to do OU instead if they won’t let me bring the kids.”

“We could try to get into London, all the Unis there are close together, we could apply for the exception housing, stay with each other,” Roger told her. He didn’t really want to be away from the kids, he’d be no better than his own dad. But if there was no other means, if that was all that could be done he’d do it, anything to make sure they had an alright future. “Maybe with the boys too if we can manage that.”

“That’s one way to keep the band united,” Brianna smiled, “We’ll see… Is that funny darling?”

Luna nodded, trying to stand up, using her as a prop to get upright, “Papa…”

“Hello Loony,” Roger grinned at her, “You wanna try walking bub?”

"Come on, baby," Brianna was still holding her up, pointing Luna in the direction of Roger who shuffled back so he was sat about a meter away, hands out to catch her too, "Just one foot in front of the other."

"Mmm," Luna hummed, slowly letting go just to land on her bum, but she got up herself quickly. “Papa…”

"Come to papa," Roger clapped his hands to get her attention, watching the first shaky step, then watching as Brianna let go slowly, hands hovering just in case.

"You can do it."

The next step took a moment, but soon the next followed, and the next and then she was crashing into him.

Roger held her close, blowing raspberries on her cheek, Brianna grabbing the Polaroid Fred had leant them, Evan still sleeping in his buggy. "Who's our big girl? Huh?'

"Oh look at her," Bri cooed, stroking the blonde curls, snapping the photos as quick as the camera would allow, "Such a clever lass."

"She gets that from you," Roger looked at her, giving her hand a squeeze. “Get some on Snap too, send them to the lads.”

Brianna just smiled, squeezing back. They were better, not yet fully back to best friends, somehow closer to lovers, and not yet anything more than friends at that moment. But they were better now and they both knew where they were going.

She’d been right, Roger realised. It was an experience. Yes it was crappy, but they would forget that, it would mean nothing in comparison to the happy times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hullo
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

"Deaks, is this coming through on both amps?" Brianna called over, watching for a reply. They had a one off recording session for the first time, getting in a handful of songs and getting to see what it was like being professional, doing what all bands do, even if it was still on a small scale.

Not that they felt very professional.

Four seventeen year olds and the now pair of ten month olds, turning up with either hand made or repaired equipment, a scrapbook full of songs and no real idea what to do on the mixing deck.

But they were trying.

“It must be, it doesn't sound like the static is coming from anywhere else,” John tweaked the amp, “Unless it’s gotten plugged through the wrong box.”

"No, I think it's coming through the monitor," Roger shook his head, "Freddie is it registering?"

"Eh... Yes?" He blinked up from the laptop, "I think we're good."

"Mama," Evan had been sleeping, tucked into Brianna's guitar case with a coat under him and one of Freddie's fur coats over him, his sister in a similar way in the box they used for the amps. But unlike his sister, he was now shuffling out, crawling onto the floor in front of them. "Dada."

"We’re here Evan," Roger assured him, trying to untangle himself from the cables to go over, drum sticks still in his hands.

"I don't think he's waiting." John pointed out, making Brianna turn to look as Evan got himself up shakily, putting one foot in front of the other, heading straight towards the guitarist.

She bent forward a bit, hands motioning him onwards, just enough to catch him if he fell, crouching down to his level. If anything that made him faster, little arms going out to grab him.

"That's it, bub," Rog caught up to them as their son walked into his girlfriend's arms, "You did so well."

"First steps," John smiled, was this something he wanted for himself? He could imagine it, sometimes he couldn’t help but imagine it... "Blimey. That’s both of them done it now, right?"

"Isn't someone a big boy now," Brianna kissed his cheek, grinning widely, "Brilliant boy."

“Yes, we love you baby,” Roger tickled his sides, making the toddler giggle and grab at his hands, “We love you.”

“A wuv ooh,” Evan parroted, or tried to at the very least, “Wuv ooh.”

Freddie smiled watching them, watching John with the kids was always nice too, he couldn’t deny it. He had the recording worked out a while ago, and it’d been switched on since the baby started talking, which means part one of Roger’s plan was complete.

But for now? They had an album to make.

And that’s what they did, over the next several sessions, working stupid hours, sometimes with the kids, if they were lucky someone’s parents would take over and they could do the loud experimental stuff, but by the end of it, they had a decent album made and ready to go, all they needed was to continue what they were doing through uni and they might, with a bit of luck, get somewhere.

***

"Bri, bed," Roger had come downstairs just after two in the morning a few months after the recording session, "Long day tomorrow."

"Studying." She didn't look up, papers spread out across the dining table and chairs, some fallen on the floors, and the laptop screen opened on a page full of graphs. She was really trying to cram in every single bit of data about the subject imaginable-

"And you already know the subject," Roger took the pen off her, "Babies want their mum awake on their birthday."

"That's on the fifth," Brianna shook her head, "We've got time."

"Brimi, it is the fifth," Roger showed her his phone screen, pointing to the date, "We were bickering this time last year too."

"Oh God... Shit I didn't even notice," Brianna pulled her hair back, eyes wide, "I'm an awful-"

"You're worried about getting the results you need to get them a good life," Roger cut her off, "Now come back to bed, they were both awake when I changed Luna a few minutes ago."

"We should take them to the park tomorrow, let them have fun." Bri decided, "and get them a little cupcake too, something they can munch."

Roger smiled, leading her back upstairs. "We can probably use this as an excuse to buy them some things, little outfits and toys now they’re getting bigger.."

"Yeah, we’ll have more space in the flat too once we move, get them running about all over the place,” Brianna added, “Shame there’s no garden, it’d be nice to have them play on a little swing set or grow veggies and flowers.”

“One day, Bri, we’ll get that, we’ll have that big house and the garden and all the stuff we couldn’t do for them now."

“You sound so sure of it,” She looked over, “How can you be so sure?”

“I can feel it in my bones, just trust me,” Roger took her hand as they reached the top of the stairs, giving it a squeeze. “We’ll give them the world one day.”

“It won’t be too late, will it?” She looked down at their hands.

“They’ve always had love, that’s always going to be around them. We’ll just have a few more to spoil them as babies then,” he grinned - they’d never really talked about having more kids. They got to their room, opening the door to see two toddlers napping away, hands touching through the two sets of bars that separated their cots. 

"Must've nodded off."

"We can snuggle with them anyway." Roger picked Evan up, his little hands automatically going out to him, "Seems like it's been minutes rather than months."

“Mhm,” She nodded, doing the same with her daughter. They got into the bed, the babies between them as they just looked at each other. “Did you ever… did you ever want to leave?”

“I thought about it,” Roger admitted, “When they sent me into the room with Luna, I had no idea what to do, I didn’t feel like I should go anywhere near her.”

“But you did.”

“No, actually, not intentionally at least. I heard you screaming in pain and I ran to see what happened,” Roger told her, “I thought, genuinely I thought you were dying… I had this tiny little thing that for a split second I thought would either be one hundred percent my responsibility, or zero percent; I realised that if I had to choose I would have picked to keep her.”

Brianna reached for his hand, finger’s interlocking just over where the babies slept. It probably wasn’t romantic like the movies, or the cheap highschool drama the world tells them they should be into, but for her it was all she needed.

“Then I saw him, our bub boy,” Roger smiled, kissing the baby on the head, “And you were okay too. I know what not having a dad does, I know what not having any money in the family does. I couldn’t repeat that, not to them.”

“I love you.”

“I love you,” Roger nodded, “Our family… You know, I’ve got you all saying that same phrase? On recording I mean.”

“Do you?” Bri blinked, it made sense; they filmed the kids a lot and they’d been near some pretty decent equiptment recently.

“Don’t worry, it’s just what we were talking about the other day, about not liking marriage, how you said we should do something for us, not for paperwork.” Roger elaborated, “So how about we do it? We’re nearly old enough for tattoos.”

“Are you proposing with something we can’t do for two months?” Brianna grinned, it wasn’t a proposal in the traditional sense, there wasn’t the same degree of pompousness to it; they were proposing a promise; something far more important than a wedding. She knew they’d stay together, a shared life - so why not promise forever? Why couldn’t they? “Also yes. Always.”

“Six weeks, seven for me, before we can do it.” Roger corrected, matching her smile, “Get the sound bite made into a visible wavelength thing, get it printed inked on. Because I know when forever is, and it started a year ago, and I want that forever.”

“Forever with you, forever with our babies.” Brianna nodded, “I like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!
> 
> So this will likely to a two or three chapter thing, will have mpreg in their relationship later on too, and was just a bit of au that sort of became it's own thing, in a way, love to hear what everyone thinks about it!


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